We’re all dealing with a lot of external factors that make our careers and roles challenging. The pace of change isn’t slowing, and our lives are often complex both personally and professionally.
However, as well as handling all that comes our way, we also tend to have some internal ways that we limit ourselves without quite meaning to, and these can hold back our career progression or fulfilment.
From the outside, things can look pretty good – strong track record, respected, delivering. But are you expending energy on work that isn’t moving you forward, or working harder than the progression you’re seeing warrants? That tends to either limit what’s possible or leave you running on empty.
What I’ve noticed in my own career and now see repeatedly in my coaching work is that it’s often not about capability or effort, but rather about the evolution and persistence of behaviours that in some cases served us really well earlier in our careers but are now, without us always explicitly realising it, working against us.
When what worked stops working
Most of the ways we get in our own way aren’t character flaws – in fact they’re often things that helped us succeed in the first place and that we’ve been rewarded for in the past, sometimes even from early childhood.
Being thorough and detail-oriented may have secured you your first promotions. Taking on extra responsibility demonstrated you were a team player. Not wanting to rock the boat meant you were seen as collaborative. Holding yourself to high standards built your reputation.
The problem comes when these behaviours still play too much of a part as your seniority and context evolve, and you don’t or can’t fully recalibrate as your role, your priorities, or what’s actually needed from you changes.
What this actually looks like
Some of these you’ll probably recognise immediately:
Perfectionism – You know the presentation is good enough after two hours, but you spend another two polishing it. That’s two hours you didn’t spend on the strategic thinking or relationship-building that would likely actually advance your career more.
Procrastination – Especially on strategic work without hard deadlines, or work that requires you to make a call about your own direction. The “thinking about it” phase can stretch far longer than it should.
Imposter feelings – Twenty years of proven expertise, and you’re still second-guessing whether you should speak up in that meeting or put yourself forward for that role.
Others can be more subtle but still limiting:
Over-investing energy in things you can’t control – Lying awake worrying about a decision your boss needs to make, or trying to influence an outcome that isn’t yours to own.
People-pleasing – Saying yes to organising the planning day, leading the internal initiative, or taking the notes, because you don’t want to disappoint anyone. Even when it’s not really helping you progress.
Indecision – Staying in analysis mode because making a choice feels like closing doors. Months later, you’re still circling the same decision and you’ve lost potential progress.
Focus slipping when you finally get thinking time – You carve out a rare hour to think strategically, then spend half of it working out what to prioritise rather than making tangible progress on something that matters.
Cynicism or withdrawal – After enough restructures or change programmes that didn’t quite land, you pull back, stop putting yourself forward, decide it’s not worth the energy.
Staying busy in your comfort zone – Keeping everything operational and ticking over, rather than stepping back to think about what you actually want next. Productive work can sometimes become a way to avoid bigger questions.
If you’re reading this and recognising yourself in several of these, you’re absolutely not alone. I haven’t yet worked with a client who doesn’t identify with at least one, and most recognise several.
I’m a recovering perfectionist myself and still have to keep an eye on when it creeps back in. The difference isn’t making these patterns disappear entirely – it’s getting better at noticing when they show up, being curious about why, and making more intentional choices about where to direct your energy.
The cost
These patterns don’t always cause obvious problems but what they can do is quietly limit what’s possible – the role you don’t pursue because you’re still waiting to tick every box, the executive visibility you don’t get because you’re perfecting decks instead of building relationships, the strategic thinking time that gets lost to worrying about things outside your control.
Over time, you end up working harder, feeling more stretched, and getting less of what you actually want.
A place to start
If you had to pick one pattern from this list that feels most active for you right now, which would it be? And if that pattern eased even slightly, what might become possible?
You don’t need to overhaul everything at once, and indeed if you set out with that intent, it likely won’t work. In my experience, noticing what’s happening is usually enough to start making different choices. Small shifts in how you approach decisions, manage your energy, or think about what “good enough” actually means can have cumulative impact.
If this is resonating and you’d like to think it through with someone who’s been in senior roles and now works with people navigating exactly these patterns, that’s the work I do. Book a call or just send me a message.